tisdag 16 oktober 2012


My enemy Nemsis, you who shift in to jaguar, last time we met, you took my arm. I asked, why? You replied with a smile, your enemies are those who teach you who to live and be wary, a Warrior will need both arms to fight ... The question is, do you have the warrior in you or have the word warrior taken over your soul. You have lived too long in the shadow of your warriors. Now, when you have only one arm, the essence that lies within you, will shine thru. This action will create an invisible arm that flips and twists in all the parts of the world and to create a bridge that binds everything together. Mourn not what does not exist, mourn the sorrow that creates the shade within you, the shade of words that follows you. I am your enemy, and are here for you, I am in everything and see everything ...

fredag 5 oktober 2012


A new day is arriving, the dawn has gone home to rest and left the shadow to wait, staring at the horizonten. It knows that it is waiting, but what ... A new dawn, a new day, a new name or a new life. Then the clouds whispers in the wind, waiting, waiting, this is part of you, you have created a waiting energy in you life...


You came to lead me a bit on the way, who would have thought that our energies would find each other. No one has embraced me as you do, in which all the colors become one, it feels like I have been waiting a long time in the bench. Have seen the world fall, but yet my eyes saw when it rose up again. On the bench has wars, hunger, love, death, people, joy and sadness come and go... My eyes always looked sideways and saw that beside me, in the bench, there was always empty. Until one day I saw someone approaching with cautious but waiting for his invitation to sit next to me. .. I know that it is time to ask you to sit next to me, and see the world together, I give you my soul to keep forever. I can't give you the love that ego speaks of. There are togetherness with my soul and the world it comes from. I want to share the energy that we create together, two flames, which becomes a crackling fire.


In the darkest forest I found you ... You are a magician who are living with the rain forest, your world is different from mine. Our meetings take place in silence, our souls collide with each other as two galaxies which transforms to dust. I am a star in your universe, I light up your dark, I open my universe for you ... You will be the sun in my universe which generate light to my darkness. You have bring to life my Fenix, that was within me, you burned the fire in my heart. You and I in our silence, I know you..

fredag 17 augusti 2012


You sit in your room, everything in the room is yours but still not ... You are trying to explain to your self why you have filled the room with possessions, but you can not get away from yourself. Sitting for a moment, staring straight into the wall, the wall becomes like an open sea and where you understand that you have sent this energy called "possessions" to what is in the room .. You have stamped yourself and the room to a property, this energy is heavy to see ... but the sea shows how all the possessions are floting, it becomes like a dance of energy and how they come and go. Suddenly the whole room is a part of everything that you get to take part of, until they float away in this dance of energy. A possession is possession when you go on in possesing everything in your life ...

torsdag 16 augusti 2012


We meet there the sun and moon come together, and either the day or night exist there. Our souls embracing, as two vines that grow in each other's embraces. This world is not like the world I know, in your arms, everything looks brighter, your soul, show me who it is .. In your soul there is everything you are.. You create space for my soul to be able to visit you. I do not want to leave this place, if wholeness does exist, it would be in your soul. We know we have to leave before our minds wakes up, you say, my mind can own me life after life, but this place nobody owns and there are you. I will always be where your soul is, as long as your soul exist, I AM ...

tisdag 14 augusti 2012


Yin and Yang were separated many decades ago, now they try to find each other again. Yang let the sun burn Yin for fear of the dark. Yin was burned and hurt by Yang's fear, she let the moon dazzle him to blindness. Yin retreated into the darkness to heal her wounds, but Yang's fear had attach to Yin, his fear of the darkness. The darkness did not recognize Yin and let her freeze in the dark where no one could find her. Yin's tears turned into crystals, but she never gave up, the darkness could not comprehend that she was still alive. The darkness visited her every day and observed her stillness, one day the darkness asked Yin, who are you? Yin knew that her strength was leaving her and the answer would take her last breath. Yin said, I am the darkness that does not exist, I am your mother  who gave you life, I will still exist when you are gone ... The darkness knew that only Yin would have that answer, he released her. But Yin did not return she wanted to remain in the darkness where the silence is, where everything is still.

The darkness came and said, Yang are looking for you .. Yin felt the fear took over again, his fear, dont let him in, that traitor ... He let the sun burn me and left me to die!!. Yin you can not live in grief and you can not live forever here, the darkness is to give tranquility not to hide. I can not keep Yang from the darkness when he has no fears of the dark, he may come as much as he wants. But without you Yin, he enters the dark In blindness. He needs Yin to see In the dark and you need the Yang part to see in the light. I get along fine without Yang, I dont need his part. No, Yin .. See what you've been without that part, you are a shell filled with empty darkness and in the end it will absorb Yin. Yang is filled with empty light and in the end it will absorb the entire Yang. You are going to exterminate each other, why do not you meet where light and darkness meet and become a prism of colors .. There, he can not hurt you or you hurt him .. Yin agreed to meet him and Yang, felt the panic hit him, he was scared of those feelings that came over him in meeting Yin. The darkness told Yang to let those feelings come, but let them go, if Yin feels the fear In you, she will destroy you and I will help, this time nothing can help you. Either you're ready and you are Yang the other half of Yin or let the sun absorb you. Yang knew he was Yang, father of the light and the sun, he is Yin's half .. Yang felt the darkness opened and he saw what Yin saw, now he knew why Yin wanted to be in the dark .. Tranquility all is stillness, this feeling of nothing, yet everything, just as it came, so it disappeared. I do not see!!, exclaim Yang. When you did recognize Yin as your other half, you did take part of her darkness, her part led you in the dark ... When she recognizes you as her other half, she will be led by you, in the light, do you understand now why we need Yin and Yang .. She will be your eyes in the darkness and you are her eyes in the light.

Plus and minus can not agree, but can give each other energy to exist. A circle of opposites that lead each other in stillness and movement.  ...

It will CONTINUE...

måndag 13 augusti 2012


Has wandered all over the universe, parallel worlds, decades of life .. Fragments of memories remain. How do we love, with our hearts? .. I know that this night like all the other nights, I lay and watched how you slept, how I was filled with a feeling called love .. The feeling gave me a taste of eternal peace, a half of me in you. The feeling made me realize if they took my heart from the body  I would continue to feel this feeling, for it was not in the heart but in my soul. You wake up, your beautiful dark eyes that were between sleep and reality look at me with your soul, you kissed me and in that kiss you did share your soul with me .. A thousand years have passed and I am still waiting to lie awake and feel this feeling again ... this is love for me.

onsdag 11 juli 2012


Do not say that we work across borders, say that we are working over the mountains to build new lows and new bridges. The word, boundaries, puts borders inside ... For the soul, there are no limits, there are mountains to climb, new lows to visit, new bridges being built and rebuilt. Borders puts borders for a while in us ... What do I choose to be in a border or be unlimited to build new bridges.


The soul's journey
Many lives, many destinies ...
The soul is constructed, in addition to wander, wander into other dimensions, other planets and here on Earth. Let us not dwell, let us continue to walk, let us become one in spirit..We are an atom and not several atoms, we are DNA ... We carry our temples as a shield. A shield of pain, bitterness, joy and isolation, but wear it with knowledge, this is a soul´s journey. Now and forever ...

söndag 24 juni 2012


You can never break a heart, the ego, does it for you. If you feel that your heart has been broken, it's ego that you need to ask. No one can break our hearts, the heart lives day by day and understand what the ego does not understand. You have not broken my heart you have hurt my ego ... the ego is always in front of the heart. Anyone who has suffered most is our ego that needs your love, to be seen.


If your feelings were from the soul, you would have found me, you let me go. If your feelings were true you would have seen your child in me, but you saw it in someone else. The body always wants to go back where it has been, but the soul knows ... I know I can not live with the soul completely out, but I follow it now. When you feel alone and abandoned, you will find a partner to fill your emptiness, your body chooses. Now that I have found my soul, I understand, you meet so many men and you see the look on their face that they want something more ... it's the body they want to give pleasure, they forget that we have a soul. My soul fills me, I don't seek love, I don't seek my soul, I don't seek a father to the future child ... I want to see in your eyes, you ... that you fill yourself with your own love, where I will find myself.

tisdag 19 juni 2012


We see everything as an obstacle or problems in our lives. Other people want to teach you a "lesson" about life .. Want to teach you to live " the right way". Many of us let them do it, even though we are aware that they do it. But eventually, life will show them new perspectives in their lives, that life is not a "lesson" ... Only knowlege. If somebody wants to teach me a "lesson", It feels it´s  more about their ego that cries out for help. Nature has show me this "I am grateful for your advice, but choose to move on".  If I stay, I will be drawn into their obstacles and problems wich does not exist. When I walk alone in nature I understand, that in nature there are is no energy called obstacles, lessons or problems .. Only present, and knowledge. Each footstep in nature brings me closer to myself, to my body, I understands that the body works in the rhythm of nature . When the body receives the same renosance as nature it feels good, you're laughing quietly in an inner harmony.

söndag 17 juni 2012


Will the black dress ever come back ... no, it can never come back it was torn apart and dissolve throug time. The black dress was free, it lived for the day ... memories are there, the feeling is still there, but now it's free. Those hands that tore the dress, was that an act of love or pleasure of the moment .. Those hands could not talk about their innermost desires, they kept quiet in the silence. The black dress knew that those hands would move on to other dresses that were her friends. The dress knew the end was near, it would never be worn again .. who did not wear a black dress sometime in her life..


When everything stands still, I can feel you, you take me in your arms and says, Let no doubt lead you, let the soul lead you, let the soul calm the sea voices. We are here with you, you are you and I am in you ... Let my arms be like the eagle's wings. I see you and you see me ...

fredag 15 juni 2012


What does jealousy with You ... limit the one you "love", the universe always want to have a balance... You can not prevent what will happen. Jealousy makes you slide apart from your partner and you're scaring away the one you "love". Look at me, I want to travel, I want go where I want, have male friends, love my pet, my family... Jealousy will take away all of this things, bit by bit, than you have emptiness. Now I know, if a feel the energy of jealousy I go and do not look back . Every day we make choices, whether it's our or others', we make them. One thing I know now, that no one knows you so well than the person who looks at you every day in the mirror. One day, you sit at a bench an thinking whose choice was it I took, my friend, my mom, my sister ... who .. Then you realize that you have always listened to voices from outside, but never from the inside... your heart.


Four people have left their mark in me and they have been my teachers. Kahlil Gibran is my spirit partner, every time I need to remind the body that there is a soul, his poems pops up. I read them over and over again, when I'm done, I have a red nose and swollen eyes and a joyful soul. Rilke is my spirit friend in the dark, with him, I reach the darkness there everything is calm. Marie Curie is my spirit's sister, she has taught me physics and chemistry of colors, that everything contains a pattern. She showed me that one has a soul husband, when no one did believed in her, her husband was at her side and never hesitated to believe in her dream. They work together, they were two pillars ... they were yin and yang. Anais Nin is my spirit sister she taught me the body's passion, that the body does not need a lot of movement to reach ecstasy. She taught me to listen is better than talking. These people have influenced me and many others, so it is with everyone you meet. Each encounter is unique in your life.


When I am out in nature, I try to blend in, get the same energy that nature has. The deer have taught me not to hesitate, when you encounter a deer get the same energy that he has ... but as soon as your heart hesitates, they run away. The horse pulled out my soul, slowly and carefully, until you feel your soul cries of joy. The question is why you are afraid of horses ... The eagle has shown me who I am, it taught me to fly and see me at all angles. The snake has shown me the ancient power that comes from the earth. The raven has shown me the joy in everything, that everything will work out and I am on the right track. The goose has shown me, you have to speak up more. In nature one finds everything ...

torsdag 14 juni 2012


Today I met a friend of nature, we talked a few hours about nature, she changed my life. She is 18 years but when she talks the soul whispers, when someone changes your life there is no age, race or status. I have been thinking of the food we eat, what am I buying? I am a vegetarian, have been for 19 years, why I do not eat meat .. I do not like meat and my body can not digest meat. She reminded me of animals been slaughtered without care, it is so stressful and we buy a stressed, beaten and tired meat that ends up in our body. Will there be any nourishment in the meet for the body or does it becomes a toxin that creates acid in our body ... What does the acid do to your body, joints, organs and the liquid will not do well in you. This is a thought for me, want to feel good and create better conditions for my body. We all want meat that has been treated with care, that gives us nourishment and not toxins. Why do we create more food than we can eat ... Sugar is like cocaine, we can not live without it, we are dependent on sugar. If you go to the supermarket  everything contains sugar, for me sugar is acid ... I want to remove sugar completely from my food, long way to go. All products containing Aspartame is pure poison to our body. We talked about fishery where they lay their thousands long nets to fish our food, in the net they will be dolphins and old turtles who die in vain and many other marine animals. Why can we not fish in smaller quantities, do we need those quantities of fish ... She made me think about switching to raw food for my wellbeing and my body. As we said "we can not change the world, but we can change ourselves." My soul is filled with joy to meet youngs there the soul whispers in them... You are beautiful Lily, you taught me that ants do not sleep ... they work and work that the elephant drink over 100 liters of water per day ... Thank you! Today my soul spoke :))))


You are my new friend in the forest who loves structure in his life, if you miss a minute then you get "chaos" ... We are like oil and water, but you touch a part of my soul. What you said about the fresh start, that here in Sweden is not my future, only the present. That I have lived many lives here, this is home, but I have to give my old country a chance, where it all began ... like you said ; You have not finished what you started in your old country, provide you and your child a new start, by the way, there will be someone who wants to live with you, but remember that the soul would never whant to own. .. but the body will take care of you. I understand what you mean today, when any man comes and wants to take care of us, it is the body that speaks, the soul wants to be with you. We talked about the relationship, two men have left their mark in my soul, one did search his own love in other women, but he fills my body and my soul, he is and will always be in me. The other fills my soul, but the body is crying, too many memories .. He has always listened to others and to become a "knight" and become a hero is his dream, he will always be in my soul. My only long relationship was of ego, two wounded souls who lived out of their bodies .. who lived in his cave. I dont want to go back. I'm done, have been addicted to this soul in many lives .. everything that was love for others was removed there was only one man you should love. As you said;  He wants you to teach him what love is, he has not worked with himself during all your years together, how can you teach him now ... No, see this as a new journey, where you are free and your child live in freedom. But remember you can never get addicted unless you allow yourself.

onsdag 13 juni 2012


Hey, I have no words to describe what I feel with the gift you want to give me. For several days I have been thinking, you meet a man who does not know you and say I want to give you the baby .. There is a meaning in everything that happens, I was going to say no, because I know you want to become part of the child's life. But today I know, I receive your gift, in your eyes, there was no doubt ... You are a body that lives with his soul, you will always have a place in my soul. To those who think of others, without expecting anything in return ... THANK YOU!


War, ask your soul .. It has seen wars, it has been taking care of the body before the war, during the war and after the war. No one has seen war as the soul has done. I ask you how are you soul after all the wars ... I tell you the body, when your body does experience all the natural shades, then you will know what war has done to me.


We're talking about dictatorships, have we seen how we have it at home .. We talk about loving your neighbor, but do we love ourselves ... We talk about peace on earth, do we have peace within us .. We're talking about donations to poor countries, it is our conscience that we buy off ... We talk about poverty, who are poor, he who thinks or who he is ... We talk about marriage, has marriage status ... We talk about friendship, are you your friend ... We're talking about children, do we take care of our inner child ... We're talking about promises, who owns you and who do you own ... We're talking about the truth, who owns the truth ... We're talking about morality, does nature have morals ... We talk about love, when did love become a word ... I'm talking about myself, who are you ..

söndag 10 juni 2012


There is no doubt, I have known you have been around for years now. I will not carry you, we will be like two pillars. I know you want to be free, you do not want to live in religions, philosophies, color, borders, or doubt. I've lived in all of this, it has given me the skin I have now, but when I was in nothingness was I in everything. My name will not be "mother", it will be the one I got when I came into the world, that is what  you going to say, than you will know my whispered name. There is no doubt, my body is beginning to change to welcome you. I can not take away your pain, but can show you how to look beyond the pain, I can not take away your tears, but can show you what to do with them, when you fall, I can not carry you, but can show you how to rise up .. You will not be my child, you will be a soul who wants to find himself. To you who live in peace..

In my soul there is children

In my soul there is children, this is my soul, body and heart..

Along the way,  I have met men, but never seen it their eyes that they want you to be the mother of their children. The journey has been tough, painful, magical, fun and full of knowledge. For some years I have thought about going to a sperm bank, it took 4-5 years to reach to this decision, I want to be single parent ... to be inseminated. I've read a lot about this and in my soul I feel peacefulness, joy and this is right for now. This is what is called living in the moment :) ... I want to thank you all who donate their eggs and sperm, you do not know how much love, care and pleasure you give us. Thank you for being there, my soul embraces you, thank you!

torsdag 7 juni 2012


One thought that has existed for many years ...

How can you live without food .. I want to learn to live without food, I eat because there is a need. Sure, the food is beautiful to look at, but feel that my body do not cooperate with the food. Who knows it might learn to live without food someday..

onsdag 30 maj 2012



Each meeting gives meaning to your life ... These meetings, which other people have arranged and told them who you are and what you do and when you meet them, they  pretend to not remember who you are, these makes you sad and withdraw into yourself. You, yes you, you know who you are ... Please, what are you trying to do ...

When I was in India I met a young woman in the Taj Mahal, our eyes met and we could not stop staring at each other , I walked up to her and before I could say anything, she said, You are a seeker like me and you have come here to find you. Those words meant a lot for my soul. We went on without creating earthly ties, our souls learned to let go without feeling sad .. this meeting still fills my soul, thank you beautiful flower.

söndag 27 maj 2012


Last summer, our eyes met, you're still here .. Your eyes follow me, why? I noticed you were nervous, I looked at you in secret, just as you had done. I saw when you went into the booths to smoke, my heart took a leap, your eyes .. they are Within me, I know who you are, but when? I can not forget your eyes, who are you? When we met, I was in a coma, unable to feel, the strenght was not there to seek answers. Who you are, I want to thank you, you brought my body back to life. To you beautiful eyes, with so much pain.

Lost in a lost time..


A story that never gets old..

Three men rode as never before, all three wanted to come first to the castle, where the famous Eloise was. All three knew who she was, she had changed their lives in one way or another. Nearby the castle was a man who where fishing, he released his catch immediately back into the water. All three men where curious, and all three agreed to stop and ask this strange man, why did he let the fish into the water again. Three man; Why will you throw your catch back into the water? The man said; It is not the caught one finds pleasure in, it is when you release it. All three man looked at each other, one made a sign with his hand that the man was crazy. The man looks up and ask them; Where are you going? The three men; To the castle where Eloise should choose a man.. The man; Now´s it time again and smiles. The three men; What? The man; Yes, You who sits on the brown horse wants to own her body, You who sits on the reddish horse wants to own her heart, and You who sits on the grey one wants to own her body and heart. The three man laughed, because it was the truth. The man continues to look at them and say; You body, you may take her body, You heart, you may take her heart, You body and heart, may take her body and heart and reach deeper than the other two for a while. Then I´m here waiting for her. The three man look at the man with amazement and says; You are sitting in the same horse and they laugh, how long have you been waiting? The man; I have no horse, do not need a horse in the silence. I´ve been waiting for several thousand of years. The three men were amazed and cries out; Several thousand years!! The Body; No way a waite so long, the are other bodies to conquer. The Heart; There are other hearts that needs love. The Body and heart; It is too long for my body and heart, they will die without love. The man; I´ve been where you are now several times, but when the soul whispers in the silence, everything stands still.. You are in your essence, where everything is. In the silence there she is, you will always be where she is. I share her pain, fears, joy, life and love. I know when You body leaves her, she goes inside herself and feel lost. I feel You heart when you leave her, she is hurt for a while, but she moves on. I feel You body and heart when you leave her, she´s not herself, you have changed her and it takes several years to get back. When i leave her, she has chosen it and I will always be there, we are never separated. The three men say; You have sat too long in one place, it´s time to move on. It is obvious thet she does not want you, you are wasting your time. Without waiting for the man to reply, the rode away. But the man answers them anyway; I´ve ridden thousands of years, I have been the body, the heart, the body and heart in many rounds, but she has always been there, sharing my freedom. We do not wait, we are free to evolve through all these stages, to the day when the soul falls into the silent and does speak.. Then I know that it´s time. All these fish that I am releasing they are these souls that i have conquered with the body, the heart, the body and heart. It gives peace and you are in the presence.. To you my free Eloise, I embrace You

lördag 26 maj 2012


New Horizons is on its way, I sence you, your caresses feels like feather with joy. Like you said once, there will always be someone who owns your body, which takes your heart ... but there is one who is always there, that do not want to own your body, your heart or your essence. This soul wants to be with you when you fall, when you are lost, when the body gives up ... this soul is through fire and water, it knows what pain, joy and peace does with one's soul. This soul speaks to the silence of the soul and knows that the soul's love is not a war ... it knows when it arises there is serenity. For my beloved soul, where you are... I am!